Yesterday I found out that my childhood sweetheart passed away. I was very saddened that I had not had the chance to see her again and find out how her life has gone. Sometimes we meet people and the world and life get in the way and we get separated from them. This is the "what might have been" moments in our life and I am having one of them. We all have them eventually.
I found the obituary by accident. I wasn't expecting it because she was so young. It did not say what the cause of death was and perhaps I will never know. These things happen in life. Many people turn from God when death happens in their life; but, this makes no sense as we know we are to die to this world. It is not the end and the other side is much better. I had a glimpse of it.
Instead of being bitter, I think about how lucky I was to have known her, God blessed me with her in my life if only for a short while. I had friends with ;me when I found out and they tried to comfort me; but, I needed to be left to my own thoughts for a little. Still, it is great to know that I have support.
My friends and family asked me if I was going to go to church today and the answer is yes. Whether or not anyone else shows up, I will be there to speak. about the bible and about God and about loneliness and loss. Loneliness and loss are a big part of life and overcoming and learning to cope with them are spiritual things.
I do not feel I have lost her, I feel as if I will know her again, the same as I feel about the rest of my family and friends who have passed on. My prayers and thoughts go out to her family and friends.
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